An Actors Life For Me

As the year dwindles to a close, most people (including actors) look back on the year and think "What have I accomplished?" "What do I want to achieve?"and "How many things can I write off on my taxes?" We create lists and either determine that we had a successful year or that we could have done better, and often it is a combination of both. But the difference for actors is that we look back in our audition books or excel files (If you are new to the acting/audition world, you need to have one of these) and we see "Wow, I went on 50 auditions and got 1". (And this is only a half a year estimate for me). For those of you who are math people (which is probably only a slight few) that is 2% of the auditions I went on, I booked. That means I was looking for work 98% of the time. Yes, that is the life style I chose as do many of the other actors in the city. In other words, we could probably qualify to sit on a street corner and beg for money. So why do we keep trucking at this career?

I found myself pondering this question before I went home to the south for Christmas. I was beginning to feel that every audition I went on I knew I lost right after walking through the door. Maybe it was time to start teaching or being a theatre critic (which I realized would end up taking more schooling and maybe be just as hard to get into?) But then I went home and got a healthy dose of why I love theatre. 1. I missed NY, I went a whole 10 days without seeing a show! 2. I was surrounded by family that knows that I love it and that it's too early to give up and 3. I watched a theatre documentary about breaking into the biz. In the movie, actors talk about their struggles, passions, successes, and odd jobs and all I could think when I watched it was "yes, this is more moving than a romantic comedy!" I'm IN love with this profession.

Also I was much more respected at home. For instance, we went to Sears and wanted a grill but we were going to be unable to fit it in the car with us. This is the scene that followed:
The Sears sale guy (jokingly) (said to my mom): Well maybe you could just leave one of your kids behind!
My mom: We just got this one home!
Sears guy (to Me): Oh yeah? Do you go to school elsewhere?
Me: Actually, I just graduated and moved to NYC.
Sears Guy: Wow, that's great! What do you do there?
Me: I'm an actor and a babysitter.
Sears Guy: Ah! Can I have your autograph?
Which, yes, I willingly gave. People in my hometown thought it was cool to come across an actor. If I were to tell someone in a store in nyc that I was an actor, I would likely get the "oh you poor thing" pat on the shoulder or just a roll of the eyes. Needless to say, I am back in the city and reinvigorated to get criticized, bashed, and disappointed and maybe, just maybe, have that 2% of sweet success!

So as you approach your new year and reflect back on everything that has happened to you remember: you've got to keep trying in order to get anything, you will fail more times than you will succeed, and the 10 extra pounds you added is really just baby fat catching up with you.